I have reached a conclusion about college residential life that culminated in my experience during my fifth night of interrupted sleep this week. I have had a variety of living arrangements during my academic career. I have lived in the comforts of my own bedroom, with parents to help me out with the gritty details of life like laundry and meal preparation. In Second Form (8th Grade) I lived in a dorm with partitions rather than walls and curtains rather than doors. In Upper School (4th-6th Form) I had a mix of day student roommates, singles and roommates who took semesters off. During my five years at Groton, my Third Form dorm was by far the noisiest dorm that I'd ever lived in. Most of the girls were new, everyone was loud, the walls didn't go all the way up, there were cliques, there was screaming, disobedience towards the prefects and general rowdiness.
I never thought I would reach a point in my life where I missed my third form life. I was generally a very frustrated girl, just emerging out of my naiveté into the self-destructive world of a cynic. As my year in college has progressed, I have grown to realize something very disturbing. I preferred living in my high school freshman dorm than my freshman dorm in college.
I am utterly shocked that I can even type these words, but as I mourn the lack of good coffee here and weep about the heavy bags under my eyes that I foolishly highlighted rather than disguised with black eyeliner, I am assured of the truth behind my words.
In third form, I was less irritable, partly due to my youth and empty schedule. On Friday nights, I could expect the girls to quiet down eventually, because no one was out getting drunk and vomiting in the hallways. Lights out and Saturday classes tamed the ruffians of my dorm. Faculty members were often present who could calm the dance parties and explain to the wilder girls, that it was perfectly acceptable for other members of the dorm to want sleep. We were taught to be considerate of others needs. We were taught that although we may not have many commitments and might want to stay up creating a ruckus, we might be ruining things for a dorm-mate if we were too loud. We learned that sharing space was about respect.
It appears that no one has taught college girls any points of consideration. Their time in high school was clearly spent being pampered. I imagine they live in egocentric worlds where rudeness has no repercussions and they are unaware that their actions affect other people. And if they are aware, they do not care. Of course, a rude ninth grader in a dorm has people to teach them right from wrong. They are willing to accept that they are incorrect; even if they moan about it they will eventually realize error in their ways.
College girls believe that they have done it all. I mean they graduated high school. This gives them the right to do whatever they want, whenever they want to. So, sloppy, rowdy, uncouth behavior becomes acceptable while going to bed at ten o' clock becomes anti-social. Good habits become punishable by the general public because the novelty of no parental supervision has yet to fizzle out.
When I was younger we were told that we were being prepared for college. Any Grotonian who stumbles upon this will be familiar with the phrase the "active work of life". If we are to split hairs, I am prepared because I have yet to explode with rage upon the offending parties. I also have found solutions to ensure that I have the sleep that I need, even if many of these solutions inconvenience me. In another sense I am not prepared. I grew up thinking that people in college would be respectful and mature, having gone similar upbringings that valued respect. I expected dorm life to grow up with me, but it apparently has not. Living in a dorm for five years has poisoned my mind against them. Now, there is nothing I want more in the world than an off-campus apartment far away from anything having to do with dorms. I am sick of having to share space with people whose personalities are supported by a foundation of selfishness and disrespect.
I never thought I would reach a point in my life where I missed my third form life. I was generally a very frustrated girl, just emerging out of my naiveté into the self-destructive world of a cynic. As my year in college has progressed, I have grown to realize something very disturbing. I preferred living in my high school freshman dorm than my freshman dorm in college.
I am utterly shocked that I can even type these words, but as I mourn the lack of good coffee here and weep about the heavy bags under my eyes that I foolishly highlighted rather than disguised with black eyeliner, I am assured of the truth behind my words.
In third form, I was less irritable, partly due to my youth and empty schedule. On Friday nights, I could expect the girls to quiet down eventually, because no one was out getting drunk and vomiting in the hallways. Lights out and Saturday classes tamed the ruffians of my dorm. Faculty members were often present who could calm the dance parties and explain to the wilder girls, that it was perfectly acceptable for other members of the dorm to want sleep. We were taught to be considerate of others needs. We were taught that although we may not have many commitments and might want to stay up creating a ruckus, we might be ruining things for a dorm-mate if we were too loud. We learned that sharing space was about respect.
It appears that no one has taught college girls any points of consideration. Their time in high school was clearly spent being pampered. I imagine they live in egocentric worlds where rudeness has no repercussions and they are unaware that their actions affect other people. And if they are aware, they do not care. Of course, a rude ninth grader in a dorm has people to teach them right from wrong. They are willing to accept that they are incorrect; even if they moan about it they will eventually realize error in their ways.
College girls believe that they have done it all. I mean they graduated high school. This gives them the right to do whatever they want, whenever they want to. So, sloppy, rowdy, uncouth behavior becomes acceptable while going to bed at ten o' clock becomes anti-social. Good habits become punishable by the general public because the novelty of no parental supervision has yet to fizzle out.
When I was younger we were told that we were being prepared for college. Any Grotonian who stumbles upon this will be familiar with the phrase the "active work of life". If we are to split hairs, I am prepared because I have yet to explode with rage upon the offending parties. I also have found solutions to ensure that I have the sleep that I need, even if many of these solutions inconvenience me. In another sense I am not prepared. I grew up thinking that people in college would be respectful and mature, having gone similar upbringings that valued respect. I expected dorm life to grow up with me, but it apparently has not. Living in a dorm for five years has poisoned my mind against them. Now, there is nothing I want more in the world than an off-campus apartment far away from anything having to do with dorms. I am sick of having to share space with people whose personalities are supported by a foundation of selfishness and disrespect.
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